I Can't be Held Responsible If you die on Monday!
Aug 25, 2019 21:01:41 GMT -5
Jaice Wilds, johnnyblaze, and 1 more like this
Post by Allen Anderson on Aug 25, 2019 21:01:41 GMT -5
OOC: Takes place in the Hilton Chicago three days before Acension. Special thanks to Dani Applegate for contributing her lines!
OOC: Dani's dress: i.pinimg.com/564x/f6/a2/8c/f6a28c0b60492c18d59e3bd2081a01a0.jpg
(Allen Anderson drags Dani to his room and pushes her onto the bed. He drops his luggage leans against the table. It was hard work escorting Dani cross country, she didn’t have her id or anything so Allen had to take the bus. Dani spent the entire ride trying to get Allen to release her and to think about what he’s doing but Allen ignored her though he was irritated when she spent the ENTIRE 14 hour ride talking to Allen. When they checked into a hotel, Allen had to say that Dani was his girlfriend much to both of their bewilderment. Allen then stares at Dani.)
Allen: I already bought you a dress to wear Dani, the Masuda Corporation will be giving you your luggage later today. (He tosses Dani her dress.) go in the bathroom and change we got some stuff to talk about when you’re done.
Dani holds the dress in front of her for a moment. She lays it down and looks at Allen.
Dani: Is this really necessary, Allen? Holding me captive, choosing my outfits, and forcing me to be your valet? This isn't a good look for you. I was scheduled for Talk Metal this week, but I had to cancel it and hire Troy for next week's episode. Not only that, but I had to cancel all of my interview bookings. I'm surprised you even let me have my phone. Where do you expect to go with all of this?
(Allen frowned at Dani as opened the mini-fridge that was on the table near him took out a Diet Coke. After taking a big swig, Allen scrunched his face and set the awful tasting beverage in disgust.)
Allen: You know what Dani?! For three weeks, I endured mockery and hatred by not only the fucking IWC but the nonfans as well! Because I lost to Smith Jones in an embarrassing fashion I've become an internet sensation for all the wrong fucking reasons! In one night! I've lost everything! My pride, respect! Everything! To make it in the cutthroat world of wrestling! I had to make moves to reassert my dominance! That's why I beat the living shit out of Jaice Wilds! Because he's thinking that he can be part of the cool kids club by punking me! That's why I made you into my valet because you don't seem to fucking get it! You just parrot everyone's opinion of me like a fucking bot!
(Allen slams his fist on the table. Surprised that he even let Dani keep her phone, it didn't matter though since the Masuda Corporation is now keeping tabs on Dani. Allen's Iphone began to ring, sighing he checked to see who it is and his eyes lit up in shock to see that it was his Grandpa. His rife with concern, Allen turned to Dani and motioned her to change in the bathroom.)
Dani takes her phone and outfit and heads to the bathroom. After a minute, she walks out, looking rather uncomfortable.
Dani: You keep saying the same things, Allen. It isn't changing my mind, and my opinion isn't based off of anyone else. It's based off of YOUR actions. You need to start holding yourself accountable, else you won't make it far in this business. I'm here because you're desperate. You hurt Jaice because you're frustrated. You're in denial, and you need a wake up call.
(The phone kept ringing as Allen gritted his teeth. He glared at Dani and shakes head.)
Allen: Dani the only desperate person is Jaice Wilds! After I beat him and Jones in the main event a week ago all that shit-talking he did to me disappeared! The motherfucker dropped off the face of the earth because he knows that I'm a talented, stable wrestler who can beat him with both of my hands tied behind my back. I've proven myself Dani and Jaice tucked his tail in between his legs left probably crying his eyes out! Look at the card yesterday, Jaice Wilds is nowhere near on it because Dani that's a man who doesn't belong. You were wrong about everything about me! I'm a beast in the ring and the reason why I'm being held back is those fucking incompetent referees and the politicians like Irvina! Do you see that I'm in the undercard after I dominated the main event?! Do you see the bullshit that I go through in just three weeks?! It's disrespectful and you are just in denial of that for some reason?!
Dani: Allen! You kidnapped a staff member! You could get fired for this. I could sue you if I wanted to! You're lucky I won't. Open your damn eyes and look at the bigger picture! You have me here... away from my work, away from my family, all so you can prove a point that's already moot to begin with! I don't care at this point if you're talented. I don't care if you've proven Jaice wrong, which you haven't, by the way. Masuda was the one that pinned Jaice, NOT you. I just want to go back to my life, and you... won't... let me!
Allen began to laugh at Dani while he still looked at his ringing phone.)
Dani: That is why you're here Dani! You may be a sassy reporter but perhaps you might be able to open your eyes to the bullshit that happens to wrestlers unlike say: Dave Metzler a non-wrestler who seems to be the be all end all of all wrestling criticism. You need to see what I'm going through right now and the pressure I put myself to be the best! Jaice is wrong! Jaice is a man who thinks he's hot shit because he jumps off high things! I proved him to be wrong! I exposed him in the main event but of course, once again you don't want to give me credit.
(The phone kept ringing causing Allen to sigh.)
Allen: Now why don't you shut up for a bit. I got to take this call.
Dani: Fine. I'm tired of running in circles with you anyhow.
She plops on the bed and frustratingly checks her phone.
(Allen put his phone on speaker something he has a habit of doing. It was probably because Allen likes the sound of his own voice and wanted to the receiver to hear it in all its glory. Allen's ego would be crushed once his Dad: Johnson "Junker" Anderson began to speak.)
Allen: H-hello Dad.
Jackson: Boy why the hell didn't you pick up your phone?!
(Allen gulped, his Dad did not like it whenever he was put on hold. Allen remembered when he was a child he heard his Dad go on a long rant just because he was being put on hold. Allen was on the receiving end a few times as well when he was busy training in the gym 3 years ago not noticing Grandpa calling his phone. The verbal lashing that Allen received from his phone still haunted him to this day. Hands shaking, Allen placed the speaker close to his mouth.)
Allen: I-I'm so sorry Dad I was busy.
Jackson: Sure you're fucking sorry boy! I was waiting on the phone for 30 fucking minutes! Do you realize I could've died in that time you fucking shitstain?!
Allen: I'm sorry Dad! Really I'm sorry I just......
(Allen is at a loss for words remembering his Dad's heart condition.)
Allen: It's good to talk to Dad. How are you?
Jackson: Wondering why my son is a fucking disgrace to the family?! I've watched your matches for the past few weeks. I have been disappointed in my life, how you wrestled. How you handled your self! Pathetic!
(Allen gulped as he began to lean against the wall.)
Jackson: Kidnapping the reporter, beating someone up while they're down?! That's how you make statements?! Not in this business! You should've been more like me when I beat up that little boy because he favored Stan the Man in my 1984 match at Madison Square Garden! That's how you draw heat! When your Mom nearly died birthing you and you were struggling to breathe but survived. I thought you were going to be a man destined for great things, but seeing my son become a joke in less than a month makes me wish that perhaps you should've died that day.
(Tears began to sting Allen's eyes as he shook his head.)
Allen: Don't worry Dad, I'll get this done! I'll make this right! The next PPV: Ascension is in two weeks! I can beat Jaice Wilds and I'll get back on track! I won't be a joke.
Jackson: You better not Allen. You're a rotten wrestler who is so far not worthy to be a true Anderson! I see a chicken shit heel in you Allen! You want to impress me? Go and draw real heat on Metal.
(Jackson hangs up leaving Allen despondent, he remained there staring at the ground not noticing his Iphone slipping from his hand. Dani hearing the entire conversation stares at Allen with concern on her face.)
Dani: Allen..... Are you okay?
(Tears started to form in Allen's eyes he didn't hear Dani's question since his mind was trying to figure how was he going to beat Jaice on Monday.)
Dani: Allen?
(Allen looks at Dani walking towards her at break neck pace. Dani scrambled back to the bed out of fear of what he might do to her.)
Allen: Am I okay? I'm definitely fucking okay! It's not like I have to live up to family expectations and fight an uphill battle in a company that's full of people that don't want me to succeed! Who want me to become a jobber to the stars! Well guess what Dani! I know that Irvna favors Jaice Wilds on Monday! I WILL beat his skinny ass to a bloody fucking pulp so badly that he will have to file a restraining order! You hear me?! I will make it my mission to fuck up Jaice Wilds!
(Dani says nothing but continues to be on her phone while Allen goes to the bathroom.)
OOC: Takes place during an episode of Vince Russo's podcast One day before Ascension.
(After the music intro for "The Swerve" plays, Vince Russo appears leaning against his chair looking despondent. Diamond is standing next to him brandishing her barbed wired baseball bat while tossing strands of her raven black hair over her shoulder. Russo attempts to force a smile for his audience of about 200 viewers but quickly changes his expression when his chat calls him out on being fake.)
Russo: Fake?! (Russo chuckles.) let me tell you something bro! For five years since I left the business, I've seen wrestling turn into shell of what it once was! Gone were the days of epic storylines and great gimmicks! Now all I see is a vapid product that's manufactured by corporations whose only goal is to make money bro!
(Diamond continues to twirl her barbed wire bat while Vince Russo takes a sip of bottled Aquafina.)
Russo: Artists like me have been blackballed bro! People have started to notice the dip in quality of Professional Wrestling bro! I had to do something about it! At first I was reluctant to do so! All I wanted was to spend the rest of my life with Amy and just do podcasts from home! I wanted to spend time with spoiling my grandchildren! I was going to live off the money I've saved over the years! I gave everything that I had for the business! I bled, argued with the politicians, got speared through a fucking cage, dissed Hulk Hogan and created the Attitude Era! I solidified myself as a legend in this business! But when I left, I saw that good people being screwed over because of petty bullshit.
(Russo's chat started to become rife with spam, saying that he knows nothing. Russo leans over on the computer screen and chuckles for a brief moment before continuing.)
Russo: I came back to help people who worked their asses off in this business, I came back for the Daniel Bryans, I came back for the Ricochets, I came back for the Bronn Stromans, and I came back for my client: Allen Anderson! For too long, the WWE and APW has been ignoring and even insulted these men who give a shit about the business! I decided to start representing the most promising talent in wrestling and fight for their rights. I had to use the money I was planning for retirement and become the Shock Swerve agent company! Allen Anderson is the first client under me! And he's been the most screwed wrestler in the world! In fact he's my guest on here today!
(Allen Anderson appears, his face brimming with anger and hate. This has been the third time, he has been screwed over a victory during his time in APW. He spent a lot of time brooding over his loss to Jonny Blaze wondering how Iriva was willing to job him out. Wondering how the powers that be is continuing to hold him back, Allen leans back in his chair as he opens a can of Coke and began to take deep swig.)
Russo: Allen how are ya bro!
(Allen gives Russo a death glare slamming his Coke can on to the table.)
Allen: I've been in APW for not even a year and I've experienced set back after set back but you know what I did?! I kept wrestling! I kept fighting the bullshit that is known as APW's booking and the crooked referees who by the way cost me my match against Jonny "who the fuck is this guy" Blaze! Where was Jaice Wilds back then?! How come he didn't wrestle last week?! The week before that tag team match where I dominated Jaice, he promised "to prepare thy anus!" Well I fucked Jaice so hard in the ass that he didn't even bother showing up to wrestle! All that fucking talk and when I kicked his ass, he tucked his tail between his legs and didn't even bother to be put on the card!
Russo: Definitely bro!
Allen: Silence Russo! Any way! I humbled Jaice's ass! It's funny that when I beat the shit out of him with a steel chair two weeks ago, he was puffing his chest saying talking all that thrash at me! Telling me to get ready! I beat one time! ONE TIME! And he took the week off. Funny Jaice, it would've been more logical to take a week off after I beat you bloody with the chair but you wanted to beat me so badly! And when you lost! You disappeared! You see the difference between you and me! Is when I lose even though all my losses were due to bullshit beyond my control, I keep wrestling! I'm aware that this business has been full of racism for years! With promoters back in the sixties deliberately placing black audiences in the back! With Black people receiving less pay than their white counter parts!
(Allen takes a sip of Coke then continues.)
Allen: You see I've come to the revelation that the reason why Irvina and her inner circle refuses to listen to my complaints and treat like a jobber is because they are white supremacists! Secret KKK affiliates similar to Dick Murdoch back in the day! Which is why I will be filing a lawsuit against Irvna and APW for racial discrimination! But enough about for now! Jaice, despite the racism I'm experiencing today! I still wrestle! Because despite all of the shit my people through! I love what I do! I care for this business and I would sacrifice ANYTHING for this business! It's in my blood! I will become a World Champion because I'm good! Because I'm obligated as a black man to PROVE to aspiring black wrestlers that you can make it in this business DESPITE racial discrimination! Like what's going on in APW! It may be subtle! But Irvna hates black people! Jaice! People call me bitch made! But I say the only who's bitch made is the man who no showed last week and attacked me in a COWARDLY fashion!
Russo: Great job bro! And I got your lawyer right here with me!
Allen: Wonderful send him here!
(Vince Russo motions the lawyer to come over while Diamond is working on her nails. The lawyer appears to be...... Scott Steiner wearing his sunglasses and a Ralph Lauren black suit that's too tight for him. From the looks of Steiner, he looks like he's back on the juice again since his muscles are bulging from his sleeves. Allen looked at Vince Russo flabbergasted at what he is seeing.)
Steiner: HEY! I'VE HEARD EVERY THING THAT YOU'VE ENDURED ALLEN ANDERSON! RACISM IS NOT COOL! I SHOULD KNOW BECAUSE I'VE WRESTLED IN A THOUSAND DIFFERENT COUNTRIES! IRVNA IS WHITE THRASH THAT DESERVES TO BURN FOR THE HORRIFIC RACISM THAT SHE INFLICTED ON YOU ALLEN! I'LL HAVE TO SAY THAT IT'S WORSE THAN 9/11!
Allen: Hey! Let's not compare my mistreatment to-
STEINER: SHUT UP YOU BUM!!!! BIG POPPA PUMP DIDN'T GO BACK TO A HIGHLY EDUCATED UNIVERSITY TO GET MY LAWYER DEGREE JUST SO I CAN BE INSULTED!
Allen: I never insulted you.
STEINER: I SAID SHUT YOUR MOUTH! LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ALLEN! BIG POPPA PUMP WILL GUARANTEE THAT YOU'LL HAVE 141 2/3 CHANCE OF WINNING THE LAWSUIT AGAINST APW! RACISM IS LIKE CONTRACTING AN STD FROM A 20 DOLLAR HOOKER! YOU NEED TO HARASS THAT ASS UNTIL SHE PAYS UP!
Allen: What the fuck are you talking about?!
STEINER: FOCUS ON JAICE WILDS! I'LL FOCUS ON IRVNA! I'LL MAKE HER GET UP OFF HER FATASS AND GIVE YOU COMPENSATION! DON'T WORRY! BY THE TIME I'M DONE WITH HER! SHE'LL KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GET IN BED WITH BIG POPPA PUMP!
(Scott Steiner leaves, leaving Allen dumbfounded at what just happened.)
Allen: Okay Russo you and I are going to talk after this podcast. Any way Jaice! You have a niece I've heard, what's her name? Mary?
Diamond: We're still looking.
Allen: Anywho you called her your favorite niece. I really would hate it for her to lose her favorite uncle come Ascension, I mean this is more than a wrestling match this will be a fight for your life.You call me insecure and unprofessional motherfucker this is coming from a guy who was suspended from APW. I come in take a red headed bitch and I left unscathed, you an'it shit Jaice! You're a walking motherfucking disaster! You throw tantrums everytime someone slights you! And when you lose, you're no where to be seen! The thing is Jaice! When I get screwed! I continue to wrestle! I ask to be on the card! When you lost the tag team match you ran like a bitch! Man you an'it worthy to be a wrestler! Why are you even here?! You couldn't beat me in a match so how can you expect to beat me in a No Holds Barred 2 out of 3 falls match?! Jaice I suggest you back the fuck up before you get smacked the fuck up! Because there's no way you can beat me in an anything goes match. You took the cowards path! And not wrestle when you lost! Can you imagine facing a black man with nothing to lose come Monday? It's going be a disaster! A slaughter! To the point where I can't be held accountable if you die in the ring! You wanted this match! And you got it! I won't hold back Jaice because I got an entire race behind my back rooting for me along with my family name! You will be off the list after Monday!
(Allen gets up and is about to leave but comes back.)
Allen: Oh and Irvna you white supremacist son of a bitch! Kiss my ass!
(Allen then exits the podcast.)
OOC: Dani's dress: i.pinimg.com/564x/f6/a2/8c/f6a28c0b60492c18d59e3bd2081a01a0.jpg
(Allen Anderson drags Dani to his room and pushes her onto the bed. He drops his luggage leans against the table. It was hard work escorting Dani cross country, she didn’t have her id or anything so Allen had to take the bus. Dani spent the entire ride trying to get Allen to release her and to think about what he’s doing but Allen ignored her though he was irritated when she spent the ENTIRE 14 hour ride talking to Allen. When they checked into a hotel, Allen had to say that Dani was his girlfriend much to both of their bewilderment. Allen then stares at Dani.)
Allen: I already bought you a dress to wear Dani, the Masuda Corporation will be giving you your luggage later today. (He tosses Dani her dress.) go in the bathroom and change we got some stuff to talk about when you’re done.
Dani holds the dress in front of her for a moment. She lays it down and looks at Allen.
Dani: Is this really necessary, Allen? Holding me captive, choosing my outfits, and forcing me to be your valet? This isn't a good look for you. I was scheduled for Talk Metal this week, but I had to cancel it and hire Troy for next week's episode. Not only that, but I had to cancel all of my interview bookings. I'm surprised you even let me have my phone. Where do you expect to go with all of this?
(Allen frowned at Dani as opened the mini-fridge that was on the table near him took out a Diet Coke. After taking a big swig, Allen scrunched his face and set the awful tasting beverage in disgust.)
Allen: You know what Dani?! For three weeks, I endured mockery and hatred by not only the fucking IWC but the nonfans as well! Because I lost to Smith Jones in an embarrassing fashion I've become an internet sensation for all the wrong fucking reasons! In one night! I've lost everything! My pride, respect! Everything! To make it in the cutthroat world of wrestling! I had to make moves to reassert my dominance! That's why I beat the living shit out of Jaice Wilds! Because he's thinking that he can be part of the cool kids club by punking me! That's why I made you into my valet because you don't seem to fucking get it! You just parrot everyone's opinion of me like a fucking bot!
(Allen slams his fist on the table. Surprised that he even let Dani keep her phone, it didn't matter though since the Masuda Corporation is now keeping tabs on Dani. Allen's Iphone began to ring, sighing he checked to see who it is and his eyes lit up in shock to see that it was his Grandpa. His rife with concern, Allen turned to Dani and motioned her to change in the bathroom.)
Dani takes her phone and outfit and heads to the bathroom. After a minute, she walks out, looking rather uncomfortable.
Dani: You keep saying the same things, Allen. It isn't changing my mind, and my opinion isn't based off of anyone else. It's based off of YOUR actions. You need to start holding yourself accountable, else you won't make it far in this business. I'm here because you're desperate. You hurt Jaice because you're frustrated. You're in denial, and you need a wake up call.
(The phone kept ringing as Allen gritted his teeth. He glared at Dani and shakes head.)
Allen: Dani the only desperate person is Jaice Wilds! After I beat him and Jones in the main event a week ago all that shit-talking he did to me disappeared! The motherfucker dropped off the face of the earth because he knows that I'm a talented, stable wrestler who can beat him with both of my hands tied behind my back. I've proven myself Dani and Jaice tucked his tail in between his legs left probably crying his eyes out! Look at the card yesterday, Jaice Wilds is nowhere near on it because Dani that's a man who doesn't belong. You were wrong about everything about me! I'm a beast in the ring and the reason why I'm being held back is those fucking incompetent referees and the politicians like Irvina! Do you see that I'm in the undercard after I dominated the main event?! Do you see the bullshit that I go through in just three weeks?! It's disrespectful and you are just in denial of that for some reason?!
Dani: Allen! You kidnapped a staff member! You could get fired for this. I could sue you if I wanted to! You're lucky I won't. Open your damn eyes and look at the bigger picture! You have me here... away from my work, away from my family, all so you can prove a point that's already moot to begin with! I don't care at this point if you're talented. I don't care if you've proven Jaice wrong, which you haven't, by the way. Masuda was the one that pinned Jaice, NOT you. I just want to go back to my life, and you... won't... let me!
Allen began to laugh at Dani while he still looked at his ringing phone.)
Dani: That is why you're here Dani! You may be a sassy reporter but perhaps you might be able to open your eyes to the bullshit that happens to wrestlers unlike say: Dave Metzler a non-wrestler who seems to be the be all end all of all wrestling criticism. You need to see what I'm going through right now and the pressure I put myself to be the best! Jaice is wrong! Jaice is a man who thinks he's hot shit because he jumps off high things! I proved him to be wrong! I exposed him in the main event but of course, once again you don't want to give me credit.
(The phone kept ringing causing Allen to sigh.)
Allen: Now why don't you shut up for a bit. I got to take this call.
Dani: Fine. I'm tired of running in circles with you anyhow.
She plops on the bed and frustratingly checks her phone.
(Allen put his phone on speaker something he has a habit of doing. It was probably because Allen likes the sound of his own voice and wanted to the receiver to hear it in all its glory. Allen's ego would be crushed once his Dad: Johnson "Junker" Anderson began to speak.)
Allen: H-hello Dad.
Jackson: Boy why the hell didn't you pick up your phone?!
(Allen gulped, his Dad did not like it whenever he was put on hold. Allen remembered when he was a child he heard his Dad go on a long rant just because he was being put on hold. Allen was on the receiving end a few times as well when he was busy training in the gym 3 years ago not noticing Grandpa calling his phone. The verbal lashing that Allen received from his phone still haunted him to this day. Hands shaking, Allen placed the speaker close to his mouth.)
Allen: I-I'm so sorry Dad I was busy.
Jackson: Sure you're fucking sorry boy! I was waiting on the phone for 30 fucking minutes! Do you realize I could've died in that time you fucking shitstain?!
Allen: I'm sorry Dad! Really I'm sorry I just......
(Allen is at a loss for words remembering his Dad's heart condition.)
Allen: It's good to talk to Dad. How are you?
Jackson: Wondering why my son is a fucking disgrace to the family?! I've watched your matches for the past few weeks. I have been disappointed in my life, how you wrestled. How you handled your self! Pathetic!
(Allen gulped as he began to lean against the wall.)
Jackson: Kidnapping the reporter, beating someone up while they're down?! That's how you make statements?! Not in this business! You should've been more like me when I beat up that little boy because he favored Stan the Man in my 1984 match at Madison Square Garden! That's how you draw heat! When your Mom nearly died birthing you and you were struggling to breathe but survived. I thought you were going to be a man destined for great things, but seeing my son become a joke in less than a month makes me wish that perhaps you should've died that day.
(Tears began to sting Allen's eyes as he shook his head.)
Allen: Don't worry Dad, I'll get this done! I'll make this right! The next PPV: Ascension is in two weeks! I can beat Jaice Wilds and I'll get back on track! I won't be a joke.
Jackson: You better not Allen. You're a rotten wrestler who is so far not worthy to be a true Anderson! I see a chicken shit heel in you Allen! You want to impress me? Go and draw real heat on Metal.
(Jackson hangs up leaving Allen despondent, he remained there staring at the ground not noticing his Iphone slipping from his hand. Dani hearing the entire conversation stares at Allen with concern on her face.)
Dani: Allen..... Are you okay?
(Tears started to form in Allen's eyes he didn't hear Dani's question since his mind was trying to figure how was he going to beat Jaice on Monday.)
Dani: Allen?
(Allen looks at Dani walking towards her at break neck pace. Dani scrambled back to the bed out of fear of what he might do to her.)
Allen: Am I okay? I'm definitely fucking okay! It's not like I have to live up to family expectations and fight an uphill battle in a company that's full of people that don't want me to succeed! Who want me to become a jobber to the stars! Well guess what Dani! I know that Irvna favors Jaice Wilds on Monday! I WILL beat his skinny ass to a bloody fucking pulp so badly that he will have to file a restraining order! You hear me?! I will make it my mission to fuck up Jaice Wilds!
(Dani says nothing but continues to be on her phone while Allen goes to the bathroom.)
OOC: Takes place during an episode of Vince Russo's podcast One day before Ascension.
(After the music intro for "The Swerve" plays, Vince Russo appears leaning against his chair looking despondent. Diamond is standing next to him brandishing her barbed wired baseball bat while tossing strands of her raven black hair over her shoulder. Russo attempts to force a smile for his audience of about 200 viewers but quickly changes his expression when his chat calls him out on being fake.)
Russo: Fake?! (Russo chuckles.) let me tell you something bro! For five years since I left the business, I've seen wrestling turn into shell of what it once was! Gone were the days of epic storylines and great gimmicks! Now all I see is a vapid product that's manufactured by corporations whose only goal is to make money bro!
(Diamond continues to twirl her barbed wire bat while Vince Russo takes a sip of bottled Aquafina.)
Russo: Artists like me have been blackballed bro! People have started to notice the dip in quality of Professional Wrestling bro! I had to do something about it! At first I was reluctant to do so! All I wanted was to spend the rest of my life with Amy and just do podcasts from home! I wanted to spend time with spoiling my grandchildren! I was going to live off the money I've saved over the years! I gave everything that I had for the business! I bled, argued with the politicians, got speared through a fucking cage, dissed Hulk Hogan and created the Attitude Era! I solidified myself as a legend in this business! But when I left, I saw that good people being screwed over because of petty bullshit.
(Russo's chat started to become rife with spam, saying that he knows nothing. Russo leans over on the computer screen and chuckles for a brief moment before continuing.)
Russo: I came back to help people who worked their asses off in this business, I came back for the Daniel Bryans, I came back for the Ricochets, I came back for the Bronn Stromans, and I came back for my client: Allen Anderson! For too long, the WWE and APW has been ignoring and even insulted these men who give a shit about the business! I decided to start representing the most promising talent in wrestling and fight for their rights. I had to use the money I was planning for retirement and become the Shock Swerve agent company! Allen Anderson is the first client under me! And he's been the most screwed wrestler in the world! In fact he's my guest on here today!
(Allen Anderson appears, his face brimming with anger and hate. This has been the third time, he has been screwed over a victory during his time in APW. He spent a lot of time brooding over his loss to Jonny Blaze wondering how Iriva was willing to job him out. Wondering how the powers that be is continuing to hold him back, Allen leans back in his chair as he opens a can of Coke and began to take deep swig.)
Russo: Allen how are ya bro!
(Allen gives Russo a death glare slamming his Coke can on to the table.)
Allen: I've been in APW for not even a year and I've experienced set back after set back but you know what I did?! I kept wrestling! I kept fighting the bullshit that is known as APW's booking and the crooked referees who by the way cost me my match against Jonny "who the fuck is this guy" Blaze! Where was Jaice Wilds back then?! How come he didn't wrestle last week?! The week before that tag team match where I dominated Jaice, he promised "to prepare thy anus!" Well I fucked Jaice so hard in the ass that he didn't even bother showing up to wrestle! All that fucking talk and when I kicked his ass, he tucked his tail between his legs and didn't even bother to be put on the card!
Russo: Definitely bro!
Allen: Silence Russo! Any way! I humbled Jaice's ass! It's funny that when I beat the shit out of him with a steel chair two weeks ago, he was puffing his chest saying talking all that thrash at me! Telling me to get ready! I beat one time! ONE TIME! And he took the week off. Funny Jaice, it would've been more logical to take a week off after I beat you bloody with the chair but you wanted to beat me so badly! And when you lost! You disappeared! You see the difference between you and me! Is when I lose even though all my losses were due to bullshit beyond my control, I keep wrestling! I'm aware that this business has been full of racism for years! With promoters back in the sixties deliberately placing black audiences in the back! With Black people receiving less pay than their white counter parts!
(Allen takes a sip of Coke then continues.)
Allen: You see I've come to the revelation that the reason why Irvina and her inner circle refuses to listen to my complaints and treat like a jobber is because they are white supremacists! Secret KKK affiliates similar to Dick Murdoch back in the day! Which is why I will be filing a lawsuit against Irvna and APW for racial discrimination! But enough about for now! Jaice, despite the racism I'm experiencing today! I still wrestle! Because despite all of the shit my people through! I love what I do! I care for this business and I would sacrifice ANYTHING for this business! It's in my blood! I will become a World Champion because I'm good! Because I'm obligated as a black man to PROVE to aspiring black wrestlers that you can make it in this business DESPITE racial discrimination! Like what's going on in APW! It may be subtle! But Irvna hates black people! Jaice! People call me bitch made! But I say the only who's bitch made is the man who no showed last week and attacked me in a COWARDLY fashion!
Russo: Great job bro! And I got your lawyer right here with me!
Allen: Wonderful send him here!
(Vince Russo motions the lawyer to come over while Diamond is working on her nails. The lawyer appears to be...... Scott Steiner wearing his sunglasses and a Ralph Lauren black suit that's too tight for him. From the looks of Steiner, he looks like he's back on the juice again since his muscles are bulging from his sleeves. Allen looked at Vince Russo flabbergasted at what he is seeing.)
Steiner: HEY! I'VE HEARD EVERY THING THAT YOU'VE ENDURED ALLEN ANDERSON! RACISM IS NOT COOL! I SHOULD KNOW BECAUSE I'VE WRESTLED IN A THOUSAND DIFFERENT COUNTRIES! IRVNA IS WHITE THRASH THAT DESERVES TO BURN FOR THE HORRIFIC RACISM THAT SHE INFLICTED ON YOU ALLEN! I'LL HAVE TO SAY THAT IT'S WORSE THAN 9/11!
Allen: Hey! Let's not compare my mistreatment to-
STEINER: SHUT UP YOU BUM!!!! BIG POPPA PUMP DIDN'T GO BACK TO A HIGHLY EDUCATED UNIVERSITY TO GET MY LAWYER DEGREE JUST SO I CAN BE INSULTED!
Allen: I never insulted you.
STEINER: I SAID SHUT YOUR MOUTH! LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ALLEN! BIG POPPA PUMP WILL GUARANTEE THAT YOU'LL HAVE 141 2/3 CHANCE OF WINNING THE LAWSUIT AGAINST APW! RACISM IS LIKE CONTRACTING AN STD FROM A 20 DOLLAR HOOKER! YOU NEED TO HARASS THAT ASS UNTIL SHE PAYS UP!
Allen: What the fuck are you talking about?!
STEINER: FOCUS ON JAICE WILDS! I'LL FOCUS ON IRVNA! I'LL MAKE HER GET UP OFF HER FATASS AND GIVE YOU COMPENSATION! DON'T WORRY! BY THE TIME I'M DONE WITH HER! SHE'LL KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GET IN BED WITH BIG POPPA PUMP!
(Scott Steiner leaves, leaving Allen dumbfounded at what just happened.)
Allen: Okay Russo you and I are going to talk after this podcast. Any way Jaice! You have a niece I've heard, what's her name? Mary?
Diamond: We're still looking.
Allen: Anywho you called her your favorite niece. I really would hate it for her to lose her favorite uncle come Ascension, I mean this is more than a wrestling match this will be a fight for your life.You call me insecure and unprofessional motherfucker this is coming from a guy who was suspended from APW. I come in take a red headed bitch and I left unscathed, you an'it shit Jaice! You're a walking motherfucking disaster! You throw tantrums everytime someone slights you! And when you lose, you're no where to be seen! The thing is Jaice! When I get screwed! I continue to wrestle! I ask to be on the card! When you lost the tag team match you ran like a bitch! Man you an'it worthy to be a wrestler! Why are you even here?! You couldn't beat me in a match so how can you expect to beat me in a No Holds Barred 2 out of 3 falls match?! Jaice I suggest you back the fuck up before you get smacked the fuck up! Because there's no way you can beat me in an anything goes match. You took the cowards path! And not wrestle when you lost! Can you imagine facing a black man with nothing to lose come Monday? It's going be a disaster! A slaughter! To the point where I can't be held accountable if you die in the ring! You wanted this match! And you got it! I won't hold back Jaice because I got an entire race behind my back rooting for me along with my family name! You will be off the list after Monday!
(Allen gets up and is about to leave but comes back.)
Allen: Oh and Irvna you white supremacist son of a bitch! Kiss my ass!
(Allen then exits the podcast.)
