So what if I lost my first match
Aug 11, 2019 22:51:18 GMT -5
BonnieBlue, Allen Anderson, and 1 more like this
Post by 'Jazzy' John McCarty on Aug 11, 2019 22:51:18 GMT -5
John: So what if I lost my first match? It's not like everyone can win their debut match!
We find John at the House of Blues after closing time, downing his second gin and tonic of the night. Once again, the Bartender is on the other side of the bar serving John and himself some drinks.
John: Not everyone can have that dream start! Chris Jericho lost his WWE debut match!
Bartender: If I recall correctly, that was because he powerbombed Road Dogg through a table.
John: Shut up!
Bartender: But your match coming up is a fatal-four-way if I recall correctly.
John: Yes, and one of my opponents is Tsukiko, and I must say I really underestimated her.
Bartender: You think? Really?
John: Shut up. Anyways, I underestimated her. She may be small, but she can sure pack a punch. And she’s smart on how she uses her skill. But I’m still not convinced. That Moonbreaker of hers is weak. Yes, it got me down for three seconds. But once I hit someone with the Ad Lib, they feel it for days, if not, weeks.
John: A lot of people downtown ask me ‘How did you lose a wrestling match to an asian woman?’
Random drunk in the corner: I wouldn’t mind wrestling an asian woman… IN BED!!
Bartender: Um, sir… we closed about an hour ago.
Drunk: I know… I know perfectly well that you’ve closed…
Bartender: So why are you still here?
The random drunk then hid under a table, claiming that they couldn’t see him and therefore not kick him out. The Bartender and John remained in their place though, not bothered to kick the drunk out.
John: Anyways, as I said, she’s smart. She attacked my leg. What a bitch. So next time, I’m wearing these bad boys!
John pulled his leg up, to reveal leg protectors.
Bartender: I don’t think that’s gonna help anything.
John: I’ll also be more aware. Next time someone does a stupid basement dropkick, I’ll know what’s coming. I’m extra aware.
Bartender: Who’s this Alex Scott guy?
John: I don’t know much about him. He’s a loner who calls himself the answer, gift, future and all-day superstar. Kinda sad one has to have so many generic nicknames. And he sounds like a generic guy too. I mean, Alex Scott? That doesn’t sound intimidating at all!
Bartender: Neither does Jazzy John.
John: Ugh but he’s one of those badass ‘lonely loner down a lonely road’ kind of guys. I’m just a jazzaholic. I’m not fake advertising. Alex Scott is.
Bartender: Okay, can you end this conversation soon? You started this conversation ridiculously late and you’ve got 20 more minutes.
John: Until what?
Bartender: I dunno. I just need you to wrap this up quick.
John: Fine. Anyways, I don’t know Alex Scott, maybe I’ll find out more about him this show.
John: But the final opponent, she’s a familiar face. I’ve seen her before.
Bartender: It’s not Tsukiko again?
John: Nope. It’s Lilianna Rose.
Bartender: *gasp* That bitch?
John: Yep. That bitch. And she’s even worse these days - she looks like a fucking whore.
Bartender: Wasn’t she part of some lesbian cult tag team thing at one stage?
John: I think so, I don’t remember much about her, but I remember beating her.
Random drunk who was in the corner but now under the table: Damn, wrestling asian chicks and beating lesbian cult bitches? Sounds like a dream!
John: Fuck me, I meant winning a match against her!
Drunk: Fuck you? No thanks, I’ll take that Lilianna bitch or that Sukyko chick!
Bartender: You mean Tsukiko?
Drunk: Who?
John: Ugh, forget it. I’m done for tonight.
Bartender: Me too.
NOTE: I’ve been lazy. Again. Next week I won’t be lazy. I think.
We find John at the House of Blues after closing time, downing his second gin and tonic of the night. Once again, the Bartender is on the other side of the bar serving John and himself some drinks.
John: Not everyone can have that dream start! Chris Jericho lost his WWE debut match!
Bartender: If I recall correctly, that was because he powerbombed Road Dogg through a table.
John: Shut up!
Bartender: But your match coming up is a fatal-four-way if I recall correctly.
John: Yes, and one of my opponents is Tsukiko, and I must say I really underestimated her.
Bartender: You think? Really?
John: Shut up. Anyways, I underestimated her. She may be small, but she can sure pack a punch. And she’s smart on how she uses her skill. But I’m still not convinced. That Moonbreaker of hers is weak. Yes, it got me down for three seconds. But once I hit someone with the Ad Lib, they feel it for days, if not, weeks.
John: A lot of people downtown ask me ‘How did you lose a wrestling match to an asian woman?’
Random drunk in the corner: I wouldn’t mind wrestling an asian woman… IN BED!!
Bartender: Um, sir… we closed about an hour ago.
Drunk: I know… I know perfectly well that you’ve closed…
Bartender: So why are you still here?
The random drunk then hid under a table, claiming that they couldn’t see him and therefore not kick him out. The Bartender and John remained in their place though, not bothered to kick the drunk out.
John: Anyways, as I said, she’s smart. She attacked my leg. What a bitch. So next time, I’m wearing these bad boys!
John pulled his leg up, to reveal leg protectors.
Bartender: I don’t think that’s gonna help anything.
John: I’ll also be more aware. Next time someone does a stupid basement dropkick, I’ll know what’s coming. I’m extra aware.
Bartender: Who’s this Alex Scott guy?
John: I don’t know much about him. He’s a loner who calls himself the answer, gift, future and all-day superstar. Kinda sad one has to have so many generic nicknames. And he sounds like a generic guy too. I mean, Alex Scott? That doesn’t sound intimidating at all!
Bartender: Neither does Jazzy John.
John: Ugh but he’s one of those badass ‘lonely loner down a lonely road’ kind of guys. I’m just a jazzaholic. I’m not fake advertising. Alex Scott is.
Bartender: Okay, can you end this conversation soon? You started this conversation ridiculously late and you’ve got 20 more minutes.
John: Until what?
Bartender: I dunno. I just need you to wrap this up quick.
John: Fine. Anyways, I don’t know Alex Scott, maybe I’ll find out more about him this show.
John: But the final opponent, she’s a familiar face. I’ve seen her before.
Bartender: It’s not Tsukiko again?
John: Nope. It’s Lilianna Rose.
Bartender: *gasp* That bitch?
John: Yep. That bitch. And she’s even worse these days - she looks like a fucking whore.
Bartender: Wasn’t she part of some lesbian cult tag team thing at one stage?
John: I think so, I don’t remember much about her, but I remember beating her.
Random drunk who was in the corner but now under the table: Damn, wrestling asian chicks and beating lesbian cult bitches? Sounds like a dream!
John: Fuck me, I meant winning a match against her!
Drunk: Fuck you? No thanks, I’ll take that Lilianna bitch or that Sukyko chick!
Bartender: You mean Tsukiko?
Drunk: Who?
John: Ugh, forget it. I’m done for tonight.
Bartender: Me too.
NOTE: I’ve been lazy. Again. Next week I won’t be lazy. I think.
