Post by Sandy Coconutz on Aug 2, 2019 19:11:19 GMT -5
I’ll tell you the truth, Alpha Wrestling; the stone cold, Leviathan truth. The kind of truth that fucks over fuccbois like yourselves. I’ve done you a concern. I’ve done you a tray-ick
Ya’ll gone 2 remember the name of Sandy C, big ol Sandy Coconutz. I’m Beach Krew from bones to moose knuckle. Lets dig into you first, lil lilli, liliana Rose. Lookin like someone stuck a Q-tip up Mr. Potato heads bleached asshole. I heard you talk shit that you dont need no man but you gone need a man to protect your flat ass against me. I’m here to ruin you. You went for the bait and now the Sand Sharks coming to get you. Square up, Rose cuz you’re about to get boxed the fuck out. I know that you think that I’m weak and Pathetic with a caps lock ‘P’ but that's only your cunty, blonde uninspired, uneducated opinion.
Face it, Rose, you’ve always struggled so dont even try to pretend that you’re above this or beyond this, cuz you clearly arnt. I mean I never made much of anything, anywhere but you know what, that's more than what anyone can say for you. You were a sad disappointment everywhere you go; like the ugly chick on the flag core that got knocked up at Bobby Scandlins keg party back when his parents went out of town so you got black out drink and the entire cross country team took turns railing you like you were one of those never ending bannister jokes.
That's you. You buck eyed, gap toothed flag core, ‘ OMG whos baby is growing inside me?’ waste of a fucking ink and paper talent that you are. You should have stayed at the Dark Carnival because clowns beget clowns and the tragic tale that is your life story is at least worth the price of admission.
Or some gay ass shit.
You had oppertunities and you haventtaken then. You look at your massacra ridden clown face and realize that its your damn fault you suck in this industry. I got the hips, tits and HITS to make it in this industry. Ya girl just has to embrace who she is.
A B E A C H K R E W K I L L A
Lets move on to your beau in training pants, Alex Scott who had the world at his fingers tips and brain just drippled out how he’s going to be champion. Now you might be sayin that ya girl was in that match, that she didnt show.
Nihilism, baby. The world is shit. Everything is shit and same aint my opponents this week. They gotta figure their live out but instead they gotta figure out where they gonna eat cuz I’m about to end their whole careers.
My name is Sandy C.
My career is just getting started.
Chapter I: Thank You, Netflix
Netflix HQ. Los Gatos, CA.
* Prim, proper. Show the thighs. Show the girls. Ya girl got contacted about a show. OMG OMG OMGEEE !! I walk into the office of Jonah Worth. Hes a good lookin guy, if you like to smash NERDS and trust ya girl, she likes to smash nerds. He sat there with cold eyes. Soft eyes but they were cold, like hes seen some stuff. I wonder why. Those eyes lit up when he saw me and if he had a tail, it was waggin. I sat down as he perked up. *
Jonah Worth: Sandra?
Sandy Coconutz: Hi! Hello
* smile, girls. Smile. *
Jonah Worth: As you know, Nextflix wants to make a show around yourself and catch that Woke Fem demo. We just want to do a day in the life of Sandy Coconutz Alpha wrestling is * sigh* doing well and they have extended you this contract.
Sandy Coconutz: why did you sigh?
Jonah Worth: Its just that I - I have done deals with wrestling promotions before after my stint with the FCC and -
Sandy Coconutz: OHHH, you’re that Jonah Worth. I knew that name sounded familar.
Jonah Worth: I did a lot of work with ZMAC.
Sandy Coconutz: Oh yah? Hes in APW, too.
* Jonah recoils and backs off waving his arms *
Jonah Worth: Dont tell him I’m here. But but
* Jonah reaches into a desk draw and pulls out an envelop. *
Jonah Worth: But if you see Ruby, could you give her this?
* He slides it across the table. *
Sandy Coconutz: Uh, ok?
Jonah Worth: Shes uh, a good friend and I just want to keep in touch with her. I know ZMAC is…. Endangering.
Sandy: Its ok, Jonah.
Jonah Worth: Right, sorry. Your shows just going to follow you around and let you reach a world wide audience with your special brand of Femme wokness. Netfliks sees how the markets trending and we want you at the front of that wave. We’ll contact APW and we’ll go through them to work around your touring dates. We’ll prolly end up filming you through those dates, actually but we’ll see how it goes. I just want you to know that this is a step in a wonderful, beautiful direction.
Sandy: Uh, what direction.
Jonah Worth: Whatever direction youre walking is a beautiful direction.
Sandy: Aww, thank you that's sweet. Thank you for everything.
Ya’ll gone 2 remember the name of Sandy C, big ol Sandy Coconutz. I’m Beach Krew from bones to moose knuckle. Lets dig into you first, lil lilli, liliana Rose. Lookin like someone stuck a Q-tip up Mr. Potato heads bleached asshole. I heard you talk shit that you dont need no man but you gone need a man to protect your flat ass against me. I’m here to ruin you. You went for the bait and now the Sand Sharks coming to get you. Square up, Rose cuz you’re about to get boxed the fuck out. I know that you think that I’m weak and Pathetic with a caps lock ‘P’ but that's only your cunty, blonde uninspired, uneducated opinion.
Face it, Rose, you’ve always struggled so dont even try to pretend that you’re above this or beyond this, cuz you clearly arnt. I mean I never made much of anything, anywhere but you know what, that's more than what anyone can say for you. You were a sad disappointment everywhere you go; like the ugly chick on the flag core that got knocked up at Bobby Scandlins keg party back when his parents went out of town so you got black out drink and the entire cross country team took turns railing you like you were one of those never ending bannister jokes.
That's you. You buck eyed, gap toothed flag core, ‘ OMG whos baby is growing inside me?’ waste of a fucking ink and paper talent that you are. You should have stayed at the Dark Carnival because clowns beget clowns and the tragic tale that is your life story is at least worth the price of admission.
Or some gay ass shit.
You had oppertunities and you haventtaken then. You look at your massacra ridden clown face and realize that its your damn fault you suck in this industry. I got the hips, tits and HITS to make it in this industry. Ya girl just has to embrace who she is.
A B E A C H K R E W K I L L A
Lets move on to your beau in training pants, Alex Scott who had the world at his fingers tips and brain just drippled out how he’s going to be champion. Now you might be sayin that ya girl was in that match, that she didnt show.
Nihilism, baby. The world is shit. Everything is shit and same aint my opponents this week. They gotta figure their live out but instead they gotta figure out where they gonna eat cuz I’m about to end their whole careers.
My name is Sandy C.
My career is just getting started.
Chapter I: Thank You, Netflix
Netflix HQ. Los Gatos, CA.
* Prim, proper. Show the thighs. Show the girls. Ya girl got contacted about a show. OMG OMG OMGEEE !! I walk into the office of Jonah Worth. Hes a good lookin guy, if you like to smash NERDS and trust ya girl, she likes to smash nerds. He sat there with cold eyes. Soft eyes but they were cold, like hes seen some stuff. I wonder why. Those eyes lit up when he saw me and if he had a tail, it was waggin. I sat down as he perked up. *
Jonah Worth: Sandra?
Sandy Coconutz: Hi! Hello
* smile, girls. Smile. *
Jonah Worth: As you know, Nextflix wants to make a show around yourself and catch that Woke Fem demo. We just want to do a day in the life of Sandy Coconutz Alpha wrestling is * sigh* doing well and they have extended you this contract.
Sandy Coconutz: why did you sigh?
Jonah Worth: Its just that I - I have done deals with wrestling promotions before after my stint with the FCC and -
Sandy Coconutz: OHHH, you’re that Jonah Worth. I knew that name sounded familar.
Jonah Worth: I did a lot of work with ZMAC.
Sandy Coconutz: Oh yah? Hes in APW, too.
* Jonah recoils and backs off waving his arms *
Jonah Worth: Dont tell him I’m here. But but
* Jonah reaches into a desk draw and pulls out an envelop. *
Jonah Worth: But if you see Ruby, could you give her this?
* He slides it across the table. *
Sandy Coconutz: Uh, ok?
Jonah Worth: Shes uh, a good friend and I just want to keep in touch with her. I know ZMAC is…. Endangering.
Sandy: Its ok, Jonah.
Jonah Worth: Right, sorry. Your shows just going to follow you around and let you reach a world wide audience with your special brand of Femme wokness. Netfliks sees how the markets trending and we want you at the front of that wave. We’ll contact APW and we’ll go through them to work around your touring dates. We’ll prolly end up filming you through those dates, actually but we’ll see how it goes. I just want you to know that this is a step in a wonderful, beautiful direction.
Sandy: Uh, what direction.
Jonah Worth: Whatever direction youre walking is a beautiful direction.
Sandy: Aww, thank you that's sweet. Thank you for everything.
