Post by america on Dec 21, 2020 23:12:33 GMT -5
“Is this a date?”
“I don’t know. Do you want it to be a date?”
Isaiah sat across from America in the fanciest restaurant America had ever eaten at. Before he signed with APW, America couldn’t have dreamed of affording a single menu item at a place like this, much less picking up the whole tab complete with a bottle of wine. Make that two bottles of wine. And a beer. Can take the boy out of the country…
“Didn’t really expect an answer like that. Not sure where I’m even going with this anymore.”
“Yes. You’re going to say yes.”
This time last year, America had been alone. He still remembered it, on the road eating at a greasy spoon diner while conversely trying to cut weight for a fight that had been scheduled for Christmas Eve. He had complained about it, good Christian boy that he was. After all, Christmas had meant so much to him in years past. Promoter just said to take the money or not. America had realized the past was in the past. A realization he had again this year on a different level.
“What changed?”
“I did. I stopped being scared of myself. Stopped second guessing myself. Stopped living the life of a kid who I stopped being years ago.”
He had realized he was tired. Tired of life alone on the road. Tired of grinding endlessly away with nothing to pay it off. Tired of living for the mother he lost or the father who took her. Tired of being a tool for other people’s means. America had done all of that and he’d had his fill. As he sipped on a glass of pricey 2017 Cabernet Sauvignon, he lamented for a moment all the wasted time denying himself of this. Isaiah’s hand grazed his lip clearing a stray drop of wine away, the act leaving a small blood red mark on the edge of his thumb.
“You’re sure? This is what you want?”
“I’m sure.”
The pairing of halfway expensive wine and a PBR had, beyond clearly disgusting their waiter, given America a tidy little flourish of drunken glee. He felt himself getting excited…really truly excited. He wondered how long since he had felt that. Since he’d given up all semblance of control and just let himself…be. A sunset here. A warm drink there. Alone. Always alone. But not here. Not tonight. Tonight was about togetherness. Tonight was about the concept of taking ‘him’ and becoming ‘us’.
“Do you want to go?”
“Yeah. Cheque please!”
The looks again. Farmboy greasy spoon manners making a mess of the environment of class these folks wanted to dine in. Fuck ‘em. He was paying enough. Healthy tipping on top of it. They could handle a little embarrassment. Isaiah chuckled the whole way to the car. America let himself laugh a little as well. He was always going to be the man he was, whether he wanted to or not.
“My place?”
“Mine’s probably better.”
America had rented out a penthouse suite looking over the city. The skyline made for a beautiful sunrise, something he’d only discovered the morning prior after coming in on a red eye. He knew he’d only get one more sunrise in the place before heading back on the road for the Christmas show. Not something he lamented this year. He looked forward to it. Wrestling was who he had always been in one way or another. Being himself on Christmas…it felt like a gift to himself.
“Show off.”
“A little better than a barn, huh?”
Jackets come off and drinks are poured. This time it’s whiskey, a decision America knows he’ll be regretting with multiple Tylenol the next day. It’s familiar but different. The old jokes and stupid stories take him back to school days when he was a younger and different person. He looks over and sees Isaiah’s muscles pressing taut against the fabric of his shirt running down to the spot on his hand that touched America’s lips and America feels a want he’s never let himself feel in all his years of life.
“What?”
“Kiss me.”
He does.
America thinks nothing, save for the moment in front of him.
The more things change.
I think about that a lot. People usually focus on the last half of the saying about how things stay the same. Maybe they’re right. Maybe who we are at the heart of it isn’t something we can ever do much with. Maybe we fight and fight to become better people all for it to come back down on our heads later. More than enough stories of self destruction in this business to buy into that. I’m not sure that I do, though.
We faced off in this very ring once, you and me. Later that same night I’d go on to win the World Title so I’m sure I could’ve been forgiven if it was overshadowed, but you showed me plenty in that match. Even with the whole world screaming my name, I sure wasn’t likely to forget yours.
Now here we are, just four short months later and everything sure is different huh? I mean, I’m still holding the title you took that shot at. But I’ve held the top gold. I’ve become a tag champ. I’ve broken every record there is to break in this company. You’ve come out the other end of things a totally different person. New name, new look, new style. And I get that. I truly do. You don’t go through everything I just described without changing a little along the way.
I think it’s great to see you back. Taking out one Mr. John Blade no less. You came out and showed that no matter what the name, the talent beneath it all…that stayed the same. You took all that bad that was inside you and made it into something new. Something fresh. But you still kept that competitor spirit underneath it all. It’s admirable.
We’re closing out this year together and it’s a little like a reflection. Four months ain’t that long, but for the two of us it may as well have been forever. I see you now and I think about who you were when I faced you last, then I take a moment and think about who I was then. It’s a hell of a mirror to look at yourself through. There’s…I don’t know, a poetry to it I guess? I was never much one for that stuff. Maybe the time of year is making me wistful.
So here we are in a Santa’s Workshop match and I know just what you’re looking for this year. You have it in your head that you can take all that skill and effort which pushed me once before and in this new and improved package you’ll have what it takes to take a win and earn yourself a little title shot for the new year.
A Christmas Miracle.
The problem is that while I’m feeling the holiday spirit a bit this year, I’m just not that giving. You can take your shot at going double duty and maybe you’ll be able to take the battle royal. Maybe you can even turn that win into a wide route back round to me and my title. But as much as the two of us have changed…hell, you practically seem a whole different person, it’s important you understand this:
I’ve only gotten better.
Apart from one small slip, I’ve been untouchable since the moment your other life came ever so close to laying hands on my title. I didn’t get that way by letting my guard down or taking nights off because this bad boy isn’t on the line. That’s not the way I work. Goes against what I believe in. I grew up believing that if I don’t put in the work every night, my work ain’t worth shit. While some champs may look at this…cute little gimmick deal with a girl on her second night back…they might see an easy night off. But even if I don’t know the you I’m facing all that well, I know the you that don’t change. The one that’s a competitor down to her bones. The one that gave me one hell of a fight. The one that’ll take any chance to get that big moment.
I know her.
I won’t underestimate her.
You can keep finding your way back to me. I sincerely hope you do. In a company full of monsters and perverts and cowardly pissbabies crying foul cause they can’t get it done, you gave me a hell of a match before and I expect you’ll do it again. Truly I respect you and look forward to every challenge you bring me.
But I will beat you.
Again.
Again.
Again.
No matter how much the two of us may change.
I assure you that will stay the same.
“How did you think you’d feel? After…”
“I don’t know.”
They laid in the bed staring out at the window. Sunrise was a long way away but cities have a way of never sleeping. There was a faint glow highlighting the room in soft yellow and orange. The warm embrace of a million lives being lived all around them. America felt himself hold Isaiah closer. Pulled himself a little higher on his chest to deliver a gentle kiss on the underside of his jaw. He had always wondered what it felt like to be in love. Always had this idea based in stories and fictions and tellings. He had long since felt as though he’d never feel it himself. He felt the beating of his heart and wondered if at long last he understood.
“How do you feel?”
“Different.”
They talked a little back and forth. America was tired. Isaiah’s hand running through his hair nearly soothed him to sleep multiple times. He fought it. He didn’t want this moment to end. He didn’t want to wake up and move on and leave Isaiah behind until the next moment he’d have to breathe between bookings. He wanted to take this time and stretch it on and on forever so there was nothing...no broken home in his past, no uncertainty in his future. Just the two of them here finding each other onward forever.
“You should get some sleep.”
“Soon. Just…a few minutes more.”
Everything was different now. A chapter closed. America knew that the man he had been had to change. He couldn’t keep being the person who said those things or did those things. He couldn’t sell himself on a lie because it was more convenient than acknowledging the truth. As the strangest, longest, best and worst year of America’s life began to come to an end he knew that nothing would ever be the same.
The Book of America was ending.
All to make way for…
Sleep. America reached his limit. Soon he began a gentle snore, breath softly landing upon Isaiah’s chest. Isaiah smiled and gave him a kiss on the forehead. America thought too much. He always had. There would be a time and a place for worries. Isaiah didn’t need to hold onto this moment. He had no fear of forever. He was confident that whatever this new life brought, they would shape many more such moments. Together.
“Merry Christmas, America.”
“I don’t know. Do you want it to be a date?”
Isaiah sat across from America in the fanciest restaurant America had ever eaten at. Before he signed with APW, America couldn’t have dreamed of affording a single menu item at a place like this, much less picking up the whole tab complete with a bottle of wine. Make that two bottles of wine. And a beer. Can take the boy out of the country…
“Didn’t really expect an answer like that. Not sure where I’m even going with this anymore.”
“Yes. You’re going to say yes.”
This time last year, America had been alone. He still remembered it, on the road eating at a greasy spoon diner while conversely trying to cut weight for a fight that had been scheduled for Christmas Eve. He had complained about it, good Christian boy that he was. After all, Christmas had meant so much to him in years past. Promoter just said to take the money or not. America had realized the past was in the past. A realization he had again this year on a different level.
“What changed?”
“I did. I stopped being scared of myself. Stopped second guessing myself. Stopped living the life of a kid who I stopped being years ago.”
He had realized he was tired. Tired of life alone on the road. Tired of grinding endlessly away with nothing to pay it off. Tired of living for the mother he lost or the father who took her. Tired of being a tool for other people’s means. America had done all of that and he’d had his fill. As he sipped on a glass of pricey 2017 Cabernet Sauvignon, he lamented for a moment all the wasted time denying himself of this. Isaiah’s hand grazed his lip clearing a stray drop of wine away, the act leaving a small blood red mark on the edge of his thumb.
“You’re sure? This is what you want?”
“I’m sure.”
The pairing of halfway expensive wine and a PBR had, beyond clearly disgusting their waiter, given America a tidy little flourish of drunken glee. He felt himself getting excited…really truly excited. He wondered how long since he had felt that. Since he’d given up all semblance of control and just let himself…be. A sunset here. A warm drink there. Alone. Always alone. But not here. Not tonight. Tonight was about togetherness. Tonight was about the concept of taking ‘him’ and becoming ‘us’.
“Do you want to go?”
“Yeah. Cheque please!”
The looks again. Farmboy greasy spoon manners making a mess of the environment of class these folks wanted to dine in. Fuck ‘em. He was paying enough. Healthy tipping on top of it. They could handle a little embarrassment. Isaiah chuckled the whole way to the car. America let himself laugh a little as well. He was always going to be the man he was, whether he wanted to or not.
“My place?”
“Mine’s probably better.”
America had rented out a penthouse suite looking over the city. The skyline made for a beautiful sunrise, something he’d only discovered the morning prior after coming in on a red eye. He knew he’d only get one more sunrise in the place before heading back on the road for the Christmas show. Not something he lamented this year. He looked forward to it. Wrestling was who he had always been in one way or another. Being himself on Christmas…it felt like a gift to himself.
“Show off.”
“A little better than a barn, huh?”
Jackets come off and drinks are poured. This time it’s whiskey, a decision America knows he’ll be regretting with multiple Tylenol the next day. It’s familiar but different. The old jokes and stupid stories take him back to school days when he was a younger and different person. He looks over and sees Isaiah’s muscles pressing taut against the fabric of his shirt running down to the spot on his hand that touched America’s lips and America feels a want he’s never let himself feel in all his years of life.
“What?”
“Kiss me.”
He does.
America thinks nothing, save for the moment in front of him.
The more things change.
I think about that a lot. People usually focus on the last half of the saying about how things stay the same. Maybe they’re right. Maybe who we are at the heart of it isn’t something we can ever do much with. Maybe we fight and fight to become better people all for it to come back down on our heads later. More than enough stories of self destruction in this business to buy into that. I’m not sure that I do, though.
We faced off in this very ring once, you and me. Later that same night I’d go on to win the World Title so I’m sure I could’ve been forgiven if it was overshadowed, but you showed me plenty in that match. Even with the whole world screaming my name, I sure wasn’t likely to forget yours.
Now here we are, just four short months later and everything sure is different huh? I mean, I’m still holding the title you took that shot at. But I’ve held the top gold. I’ve become a tag champ. I’ve broken every record there is to break in this company. You’ve come out the other end of things a totally different person. New name, new look, new style. And I get that. I truly do. You don’t go through everything I just described without changing a little along the way.
I think it’s great to see you back. Taking out one Mr. John Blade no less. You came out and showed that no matter what the name, the talent beneath it all…that stayed the same. You took all that bad that was inside you and made it into something new. Something fresh. But you still kept that competitor spirit underneath it all. It’s admirable.
We’re closing out this year together and it’s a little like a reflection. Four months ain’t that long, but for the two of us it may as well have been forever. I see you now and I think about who you were when I faced you last, then I take a moment and think about who I was then. It’s a hell of a mirror to look at yourself through. There’s…I don’t know, a poetry to it I guess? I was never much one for that stuff. Maybe the time of year is making me wistful.
So here we are in a Santa’s Workshop match and I know just what you’re looking for this year. You have it in your head that you can take all that skill and effort which pushed me once before and in this new and improved package you’ll have what it takes to take a win and earn yourself a little title shot for the new year.
A Christmas Miracle.
The problem is that while I’m feeling the holiday spirit a bit this year, I’m just not that giving. You can take your shot at going double duty and maybe you’ll be able to take the battle royal. Maybe you can even turn that win into a wide route back round to me and my title. But as much as the two of us have changed…hell, you practically seem a whole different person, it’s important you understand this:
I’ve only gotten better.
Apart from one small slip, I’ve been untouchable since the moment your other life came ever so close to laying hands on my title. I didn’t get that way by letting my guard down or taking nights off because this bad boy isn’t on the line. That’s not the way I work. Goes against what I believe in. I grew up believing that if I don’t put in the work every night, my work ain’t worth shit. While some champs may look at this…cute little gimmick deal with a girl on her second night back…they might see an easy night off. But even if I don’t know the you I’m facing all that well, I know the you that don’t change. The one that’s a competitor down to her bones. The one that gave me one hell of a fight. The one that’ll take any chance to get that big moment.
I know her.
I won’t underestimate her.
You can keep finding your way back to me. I sincerely hope you do. In a company full of monsters and perverts and cowardly pissbabies crying foul cause they can’t get it done, you gave me a hell of a match before and I expect you’ll do it again. Truly I respect you and look forward to every challenge you bring me.
But I will beat you.
Again.
Again.
Again.
No matter how much the two of us may change.
I assure you that will stay the same.
“How did you think you’d feel? After…”
“I don’t know.”
They laid in the bed staring out at the window. Sunrise was a long way away but cities have a way of never sleeping. There was a faint glow highlighting the room in soft yellow and orange. The warm embrace of a million lives being lived all around them. America felt himself hold Isaiah closer. Pulled himself a little higher on his chest to deliver a gentle kiss on the underside of his jaw. He had always wondered what it felt like to be in love. Always had this idea based in stories and fictions and tellings. He had long since felt as though he’d never feel it himself. He felt the beating of his heart and wondered if at long last he understood.
“How do you feel?”
“Different.”
They talked a little back and forth. America was tired. Isaiah’s hand running through his hair nearly soothed him to sleep multiple times. He fought it. He didn’t want this moment to end. He didn’t want to wake up and move on and leave Isaiah behind until the next moment he’d have to breathe between bookings. He wanted to take this time and stretch it on and on forever so there was nothing...no broken home in his past, no uncertainty in his future. Just the two of them here finding each other onward forever.
“You should get some sleep.”
“Soon. Just…a few minutes more.”
Everything was different now. A chapter closed. America knew that the man he had been had to change. He couldn’t keep being the person who said those things or did those things. He couldn’t sell himself on a lie because it was more convenient than acknowledging the truth. As the strangest, longest, best and worst year of America’s life began to come to an end he knew that nothing would ever be the same.
The Book of America was ending.
All to make way for…
Sleep. America reached his limit. Soon he began a gentle snore, breath softly landing upon Isaiah’s chest. Isaiah smiled and gave him a kiss on the forehead. America thought too much. He always had. There would be a time and a place for worries. Isaiah didn’t need to hold onto this moment. He had no fear of forever. He was confident that whatever this new life brought, they would shape many more such moments. Together.
“Merry Christmas, America.”
