Blasts from the Past

: The scene opens up in the living room of The Zybala's home. They are relaxing on the couch and finally getting around to watching "Stranger Things." Don't judge, they had a lot of shows to catch up on. Eleven just psychically knocked Max off of her skateboard in the show when Mike's cell phone starts to ring. He looks at it and sees that his long time friend, Dave Van Dam is calling him. He pauses the show and answers the phone. His wife looks at him. :


Cathy: Everything okay?

Mike: Yeah, it's Dave. Hold on, I'll put it on speaker. (taps his phone screen.) David! How the hell are you?

Dave: Mikey Z! I'm good, man. How are you? How's the wife?

Mike: We're good. Just watching TV. You're on speaker, by the way.

Cathy: Hi Dave! How's the wife and baby?

Dave: Everyone is good. How are you?

Cathy: I'm good. Just hating this quarantine stuff.

Dave: We are too.

Mike: Aren't we all? Just gotta hope the government will get a vaccine soon. So what do I owe the pleasure of this call?

Dave: Well you see, I sort of volunteered us for a match for that fed of Gust's.

Mike: Have an itch for The High and Mighty to come back?

Dave: Something like that. Gust said he was gonna email us both a PDF file for plane tickets.

Mike: You can do that?!

Dave: Apparently. He told me the card was on the company's website. I sent you the link he gave me.


: Zybala's phone jingles as it receives a text. He taps on the screen a bit. He scrolls through and taps some more. He looks at the screen a bit before his eyes go wide. Mike starts talking again. :


Mike: Dave? Did you bother to check out who we're going to be facing?

Dave: No, I just know the names Gust sent me. The Very Big Supervillians or something like that. Here I thought the Power Rangers gimmick was dorky in Boardwalk.

Mike: Dude, these dudes are fucking massive! The one guy looks like a K-Mart Blue Light Special version of The Yeti from WCW, and the other one is almost as tall and twice as fat! Jesus, how do people even grow to seven feet?!

Dave: I guess the "very big" part wasn't an exaggeration.

Mike: Not at all. Did you piss off Gust lately?

Dave: Not that I know of. Haven't really talked to him.

Mike: Did I piss him off? Shit, do I owe him money from Boardwalk? Do WE owe him money from back then?

Dave: I wouldn't be surprised if we do. There was a lot of drinking after the shows. We probably lost money to him at the casino and never paid up.

Mike: Maybe. Things are a little fuzzy from back then. Maybe he's mad that I never joined any of his other feds after BW.

Dave: Does it really matter? What's done is done, and we can't change it. Are you really that worried about them?

Mike: About them? No. About what could happen while facing them? Most definitely.

Dave: What do you mean?

Mike: Well, take the really fat one. William. He looks like he hasn't done a day of conditioning in his entire life. He looks like a fucking walking health risk. I've never had anyone see in the ring against me before, but this giant tub of blubber looks like he'll have a heart attack around the five minute mark. And the Yeti rip off looks like he hasn't changed those bandages since Cleopatra's era. Can you imagine how bad these guys smell? Seriously, how can we deal with that? I'm used to fight people way bigger than me, but nobody was ever that much of a health risk to me.

Dave: You're rambling, Mike. Trust me. It's all going to work out. Have we ever lost before while teaming up?

Mike: Here and there, but we've definitely won more than we've lost.

Dave: Exactly. Besides, I have a plan.

Mike: One I'm sure that you'll keep me in the dark until the very last minute, or whenever you feel like telling me?

Dave: You know me so well. I'm gonna let you go. Have fun watching t.v.

Mike: I will. Have fun signing me up for stuff THEN telling me about it. Give Vicky and the baby hugs from me. Later buddy.

Dave: See ya.


: Zybala hangs up the phone and continues to look at the pictures of his future opponents. He leans over to show his wife, and when she looks, she visibly cringes. :


Cathy: Holy crap! That guy obviously never said no to any food ever. THATS who you and Dave have to fight?!

Mike: Unfortunately, yes.

Cathy: You're not gonna try to slam them, are you?

Mike: The skinnier one, maybe. The other one? No chance in hell. God, I have a hernia just thinking about it.


: Mike then gets up. Cathy looks quizzically at her husband. :


Cathy: What are you doing? You're not going to work for the match now, are you? We're in the middle of a show.

Mike: No, I just got to use the bathroom. There's no amount of training I can do that will get me to be able to lift that big guy by next Monday. Besides, I want to see what happens next. We shouldn't have waited so long to get into this show.


: Mike then heads off to answer the call of nature. No, we don't get to follow and watch. What kind of weirdo are you? You disgust me. Why do you want to compare sizes?! That's it! We're done here. The scene fades to black. :




I haven't teamed up with Dave Van Dam for over five years. Sure, we've kept in touch over that time. Wish each other happy holidays and Happy Birthday, which we share. April 11th Brothers! But as for tagging, or even being in the same company, that hasn't happened since 2015. Hell, I thought he retired to start a family with his wife. So imagine my surprise when I get the call from him not only saying that he's out of retirement, but also signed US up for a tag match without asking me. It's whatever though. Dave has always been as impulsive as I have. It's one of the reasons why we get along so well. And people always thought he was the more level headed of the two of us.

We've got a long and storied history between us. He has been my brother in arms for fifteen long years; ever since our days back in SFT or STW or whatever the name is now. The company Shadow ran before his unfortunate passing. Dave and I have been in the ring together more times than I can count, either as foes or as partners. We've traded every single title between each other back in SFT(TW) from the Hardcore to the World. We've been tag team champions in a few different companies. I ended his SFT career and he put me in a coma in Boardwalk Wrestling. He's probably the best friend I've made in this business and there is no one I'd rather have in my corner.

So how can anyone overgrown toilet paper roll named Travis and the live version of Marvel's The Blob, dream to compete with us? They may have the size and strength, but we have everything else. The smarts, the experience, the speed, everything! From what I bothered to look up about them, they'll be simple to beat, especially with the game plan they most likely have. "Grab small guys. Smash small guys. Win." Greeeeat game plan. That's sarcasm by the way. It won't work because you won't be able to catch us. Dave might want to go all out just to show he doesn't have any ring rust, but I'm gonna play it smarter. Pick my spots and hit and move.

Something William might call "cheating." Since I'm a midget compared to him, that automatically makes me unhonorable and a cheat. Sorry that we all couldn't be born with over active glands and parents who never told us to maybe have a salad just once in our life. Jesus Christ Willy, buffets must tremble in fear when they see you're enormous ass walking up to the door. Hell, I'm half afraid that you might try to eat ME during the match. Maybe I will cheat during the match. Have someone bring you out a bucket of KFC halfway during the match and let Colonel Sanders eleven herbs and spices do the work for me. Lure you outside of the ring with the crispy chicken goodness and win by count-out as you stuff your face.

That would leave Travis the mummy. How to deal with him? We can do the "cheating, dastardly midget" approach and go The Mummy route. Just throw a few cats at the tall bastard and watch him run, or stiffly walk in his case, away. We could also unravel all of his bandages and let the skeleton inside crumble. We could set him on fire or show him his own reflection if anyone gets the Thundercats reference. Those would be the traditional ways to defeat a mummy like Travis.

Those ways don't sit well with me though. I'd rather just do what I can to pin either of them. I'd rather rely on my skills then tricks and cheating. I'd rather take pride in a win then regret having resorted to cheap tricks. I'm a hall of famer for God sake, and I didn't earn that by being a sneaky little shit. I earned it by being and beating the best in every company I've been in, winning title after title. Even though this match isn't for any title and I'm pretty sure that The Very Big Supervillians aren't the best APW has to offer, I'm still gonna give this match my all. Because, this just might be a one of return for Van Dam, and I want his last match to be a win. Not that either of us NEED the win, it's always just nice to go out on a high note.

If we lose, Dave goes back to retirement and I go back to kicking ass in GCWA. If we win though, that might give Dave that itch again. The itch to get back in the ring and compete. That would be bad news for everyone hoping to be the next big thing. That would mean Dave would be standing in their way on the road to a title. Trust me when I say that Dave is one nasty pothole on that particular road. While he may be cool as hell out of the ring, inside it he's a vicious sonofabitch that doesn't care who you are. We're alike in that aspect. All we see is someone getting in our way from gaining another win, and we doesn't take kindly to that.