Post by Steven Osbourne on Jun 16, 2019 20:24:21 GMT -5
The lights are out. Steven Osbourne lays on a hospital bed with about 50 pounds of gauze wrapped around his head. Veronica Anderson and Amber Del Vallee walk in.
ADV: Like oh my god.. poor Stevie.
Steven gives a shit eating grin.
Osbourne: Kiss it better.
Veronica Anderson smacks him.
Osbourne: Owww... my concussion!
Anderson: You don't have a concussion!
Osbourne: Why are you hitting me.. it was Amber's fault!
Anderson: Because you're the one who snuck into the supply closet with that gurney and wrapped yourself up like a mummy!
Osbourne: Totally would have got me laid.
ADV: Mummies are hot.
Osbourne: See?
Anderson: I don't know if you idiots realize it.. but you lost tonight.
Osbourne: I got to grab some boobs.
Anderson: You are a boob! And you never even did that.
Steven reaches out and honks Veronica. Then gets off the stretcher and struts around.
Osbourne: So did!
Veronica reacts quickly kicking Steven in the groin. He goes down.
Osbourne: Damnit! That fucking hurts. That's what I've been doing to people all these years? No wonder nobody likes me.
ADV: I like you.
Osbourne: Awww thanks.. honk!
Steven grabs Amber's boob as well. Veronica kicks him in the junk again.
Osbourne: Oww! What'd you do that for?
Anderson: I was offended on her behalf.
Osbourne: Will you stop kicking me in the nutty buddies if I win next week.
Anderson: I'll consider it but I make no promises. What is your game plan?
Osbourne: I could research my opponents. But that's no fun. So I'll simply slander them! Serenity Sherman and Kamikaze have stupid names and sound like create a wrestlers in a cheesey wrestling video game! They suck.. each other.
Anderson: Seriously? I'm considering resigning as your manager.
Osbourne: I'm considering firing you.
Anderson: I wish you would.
Osbourne: You're cute when you're mad. Besides Ronnie we got this in the bag. Lucy Sixx beat me so she must be good. Even if the only reason she won is because the ref was stupid. Lucy should be been disqualified when Amber hit me with the chair. That was outside interference.
Anderson: She's your manager!
ADV: Like pyschics is hard. The wind totally blew that chair in Steven's face.
Anderson: Honey.. we were indoors. Amber do me a favor.. leave the cheating to me.
Osbourne: You want to cheat on your husband with me?
Anderson: I don't even have a husband.
Osbourne: See? I knew you wanted me!
Anderson: I won't dignify that with a response.
Osbourne: Will you answer if Lucy and I win this week?
Anderson: Fine.
Osbourne: Woo hoo! Consider me motivated! I'm gonna kick ass. Then go home and lick ass. You know to celebrate.
Anderson: I don't care how you celebrate as long as you win.
Osbourne: Of course we're going to win. This is the first ever tag team of the future tag team champions of the world.. the Super Sexy Sixx-niners!
ADV: I like 69.
Osbourne: Me too! We have so much in common.
Anderson: Aren't you going to talk about your match?
Osbourne: I'm gonna beat Serenity and Kamikaze so bad they are actually going to need these bandages. Their names sound like drinks so I'm gonna make em feel like they are hangover. Or just cheat like hell. Or roll em up from behind. Either way a win is a win and the Oz man is undefeated in tag team matches.
ADV: Isn't this like your first one?
Osbourne: Still undefeated babe. That ain't gonna change this week either.
Anderson: Whatever.
ADV: Hey! You like stole my line again.
Osbourne: Just like I'm gonna steal the win. Boom.. dynamite.. fireworks.. cheating.. pure Oz.
ADV: Like oh my god.. poor Stevie.
Steven gives a shit eating grin.
Osbourne: Kiss it better.
Veronica Anderson smacks him.
Osbourne: Owww... my concussion!
Anderson: You don't have a concussion!
Osbourne: Why are you hitting me.. it was Amber's fault!
Anderson: Because you're the one who snuck into the supply closet with that gurney and wrapped yourself up like a mummy!
Osbourne: Totally would have got me laid.
ADV: Mummies are hot.
Osbourne: See?
Anderson: I don't know if you idiots realize it.. but you lost tonight.
Osbourne: I got to grab some boobs.
Anderson: You are a boob! And you never even did that.
Steven reaches out and honks Veronica. Then gets off the stretcher and struts around.
Osbourne: So did!
Veronica reacts quickly kicking Steven in the groin. He goes down.
Osbourne: Damnit! That fucking hurts. That's what I've been doing to people all these years? No wonder nobody likes me.
ADV: I like you.
Osbourne: Awww thanks.. honk!
Steven grabs Amber's boob as well. Veronica kicks him in the junk again.
Osbourne: Oww! What'd you do that for?
Anderson: I was offended on her behalf.
Osbourne: Will you stop kicking me in the nutty buddies if I win next week.
Anderson: I'll consider it but I make no promises. What is your game plan?
Osbourne: I could research my opponents. But that's no fun. So I'll simply slander them! Serenity Sherman and Kamikaze have stupid names and sound like create a wrestlers in a cheesey wrestling video game! They suck.. each other.
Anderson: Seriously? I'm considering resigning as your manager.
Osbourne: I'm considering firing you.
Anderson: I wish you would.
Osbourne: You're cute when you're mad. Besides Ronnie we got this in the bag. Lucy Sixx beat me so she must be good. Even if the only reason she won is because the ref was stupid. Lucy should be been disqualified when Amber hit me with the chair. That was outside interference.
Anderson: She's your manager!
ADV: Like pyschics is hard. The wind totally blew that chair in Steven's face.
Anderson: Honey.. we were indoors. Amber do me a favor.. leave the cheating to me.
Osbourne: You want to cheat on your husband with me?
Anderson: I don't even have a husband.
Osbourne: See? I knew you wanted me!
Anderson: I won't dignify that with a response.
Osbourne: Will you answer if Lucy and I win this week?
Anderson: Fine.
Osbourne: Woo hoo! Consider me motivated! I'm gonna kick ass. Then go home and lick ass. You know to celebrate.
Anderson: I don't care how you celebrate as long as you win.
Osbourne: Of course we're going to win. This is the first ever tag team of the future tag team champions of the world.. the Super Sexy Sixx-niners!
ADV: I like 69.
Osbourne: Me too! We have so much in common.
Anderson: Aren't you going to talk about your match?
Osbourne: I'm gonna beat Serenity and Kamikaze so bad they are actually going to need these bandages. Their names sound like drinks so I'm gonna make em feel like they are hangover. Or just cheat like hell. Or roll em up from behind. Either way a win is a win and the Oz man is undefeated in tag team matches.
ADV: Isn't this like your first one?
Osbourne: Still undefeated babe. That ain't gonna change this week either.
Anderson: Whatever.
ADV: Hey! You like stole my line again.
Osbourne: Just like I'm gonna steal the win. Boom.. dynamite.. fireworks.. cheating.. pure Oz.
