Post by Lazer Blazer on Jun 12, 2019 20:20:45 GMT -5
( Lazer Johnson arrives via Uber to the Capitol ONE arena. Alpha Cameras catch up to him being dropped off at the front door as he looks up , shaking his hair from his face. Wide eyed he mouths "WOW." The Lazer is star struck. With his Zuba Pants, Gold's Gym tank top and all black walmart sneakers, Lazer picks up his duffel bag and walks through the crowd and into the arena )
INSIDE THE ARENA
( Lazer is getting dressed out in the hall, as he's not used to dressing rooms. By the time the cameras circle back around, Lazer his lacing his white boots. A production assistant walks past with a clip board as Lazer stops them. )
Lazer Johnson: Wow, man, can you like, believe it; The Capitol ONE center. This place is huge. I've never been here before in my whole entire life and I don’t mean to drag but the Lazers been all over the world.
( the assistant ignores him and keeps moving. )
Lazer Johnson: Hey man, good talking with you. * fist pump * We'll have to catch up tonight and celebrate.
( Danni Applegate comes up to Lazer with a microphone to get a word. )
Dani: Lazer, this is your first match in Alpha Wrestling; how are you feeling right now?
Lazer Johnson: Right now? Right now, Right now? Well Debra, The lazer feels GREAT! I aint never been here before. I aint never faced Tom Ambrose before but I hear he’s one H-E double ECK of a competitor. The lazer cannot wait to get in that ring and go double barrel! PEW PEW, POW POW.
Dani: Well Lazer, Tom is kinda dangerous. He’s been in a mental hospital his whole life. He likes to hurt people.
( Lazer looks happy and oblivious to Danis statement. )
Lazer Johnson: Hey, whatever gets you to the dance and Lazer Johnson is ready to party and as you know, its E-LEK-TRIC, boogie-woogie-woogie
* ELECTRIC SLIDE OUTTA NOWHERE *
Lazer Johnson: Tom Ambrose might be dangerous like you say but the Lazer is a Brick House. I am mighty mighty and I’m going to let it all hang out.
* Lazer Johnson, the madman that he is, breaking out the Brick House shuffle *
( Dani is confused and scared. She needs an adult. )
Dani: Are you ok? Are you having a stroke? Do I need to get medical?
Lazer Johnson: What? No. That's the brick house shuffle and the Electric slide.
Dani: Sir. Sir, I’m 24.
( Lazer looks dejected. )
Lazer Johnson: Well go look it up on your Macintosh later. You’ll see. You won’t be disappointed. Its groovy. But as far as Tom is concerned, he may be strong, he may be crazy, he may even be uglier than his mama but I want him to know one thing - wherever there's amazing, there is going to be Lazer Johnson and tonight will be amazing. I know this is going to be tough but the Lazer is up for the challenge. Tom better watch out for that Dazzle drop kick and that Lazer Blazer! PEW, PEW, POW, POW, POW
* epic baby face pose *
INSIDE THE ARENA
( Lazer is getting dressed out in the hall, as he's not used to dressing rooms. By the time the cameras circle back around, Lazer his lacing his white boots. A production assistant walks past with a clip board as Lazer stops them. )
Lazer Johnson: Wow, man, can you like, believe it; The Capitol ONE center. This place is huge. I've never been here before in my whole entire life and I don’t mean to drag but the Lazers been all over the world.
( the assistant ignores him and keeps moving. )
Lazer Johnson: Hey man, good talking with you. * fist pump * We'll have to catch up tonight and celebrate.
( Danni Applegate comes up to Lazer with a microphone to get a word. )
Dani: Lazer, this is your first match in Alpha Wrestling; how are you feeling right now?
Lazer Johnson: Right now? Right now, Right now? Well Debra, The lazer feels GREAT! I aint never been here before. I aint never faced Tom Ambrose before but I hear he’s one H-E double ECK of a competitor. The lazer cannot wait to get in that ring and go double barrel! PEW PEW, POW POW.
Dani: Well Lazer, Tom is kinda dangerous. He’s been in a mental hospital his whole life. He likes to hurt people.
( Lazer looks happy and oblivious to Danis statement. )
Lazer Johnson: Hey, whatever gets you to the dance and Lazer Johnson is ready to party and as you know, its E-LEK-TRIC, boogie-woogie-woogie
* ELECTRIC SLIDE OUTTA NOWHERE *
Lazer Johnson: Tom Ambrose might be dangerous like you say but the Lazer is a Brick House. I am mighty mighty and I’m going to let it all hang out.
* Lazer Johnson, the madman that he is, breaking out the Brick House shuffle *
( Dani is confused and scared. She needs an adult. )
Dani: Are you ok? Are you having a stroke? Do I need to get medical?
Lazer Johnson: What? No. That's the brick house shuffle and the Electric slide.
Dani: Sir. Sir, I’m 24.
( Lazer looks dejected. )
Lazer Johnson: Well go look it up on your Macintosh later. You’ll see. You won’t be disappointed. Its groovy. But as far as Tom is concerned, he may be strong, he may be crazy, he may even be uglier than his mama but I want him to know one thing - wherever there's amazing, there is going to be Lazer Johnson and tonight will be amazing. I know this is going to be tough but the Lazer is up for the challenge. Tom better watch out for that Dazzle drop kick and that Lazer Blazer! PEW, PEW, POW, POW, POW
* epic baby face pose *
